USDA screw-up could sicken 70% of America

When Thomas Jefferson plunked down $15 million for the Louisiana Purchase, he doubled the size of America overnight.

Well, Jefferson's got nothing on today's feds, because somehow, these incompetent boobs managed to turn a supposed four-state outbreak into a 35 state crises in the blink of an eye.

And they may not be finished by a longshot!

Remember when your kid did laundry for the first time? There was soap on the floor, water everywhere, and I bet he looked you right in the eye and said, "I've got this under control." Well, that was the same kind of nonsense the feds asked us to swallow when they let 9 million pounds of diseased-laced, cancer-riddled beef into the market this year.

As I told you a couple weeks ago, the USDA "forgot" to inspect a year's supply of meat from one of the largest processors in the West -- but they pinky promised the outbreak was limited to a few states... four AT MOST. Of course, every sane person knew they were lying through their teeth, and now they're being forced to admit it.

The recall of Rancho Feeding beef has reached 35 states -- we're talking 70% of America -- and the feds are scrambling to pull steaks off the shelves before you start feeling like dead meat yourself. Some of the diseased beef may have even made its way into Hot Pockets, a true tragedy for unemployed 20-somethings living in their parents' basements. (Maybe we shouldn't tell them.)

Be sure to check with your local grocer and make sure he's gotten this poison out of his shop. Better yet, start buying only local organic beef instead. That way you can inspect the cows for yourself if you feel like it -- because it's clearer than ever that our days of trusting those meatheads in the government are over for good.

Starting a "beef" with bad beef,

William Campbell Douglass II, M.D.