Lose your hearing, lose your head

As a doctor, I'm an expert at delivering bad news. So I'm here today to perform an intervention on behalf of every poor sap who has to deal with you during the course of a day.

Be honest with yourself, friend. Each Sunday you move closer to the front of the church, and it's not because you're getting more religious. The postman may always ring twice, but he has to ring five times before YOU realize somebody's at the door. You have Wheel of Fortune turned up so loud, Pat Sajak is practically screaming vowels.

YOU'RE DEAF AS A POST, and it's high time you did something about it. Because by leaving your hearing loss untreated, you're not just missing out on all the wonderful conversations life has to offer -- you're actually getting dumber, one day at a time.

Can you hear me now?

A new study from Johns Hopkins found that once you develop hearing loss, your brain starts shrinking at warp speed. Researchers followed 126 seniors and found that folks with hearing loss were more likely to be cruising down the pothole-pocked road to senility. And this isn't the first study to link bad ears with a rotting brain -- it's just the latest.

I'm older than Methuselah's uncle, but I could hear a ladybug peeing on cotton. I've always taken my hearing seriously, which is one way I'm keeping my brain bigger than a breadbox.

Stop treating hearing loss as a rite of passage. Swallow your pride and get those bum ears checked out today. Because between good hearing and reading my Daily Dose every day, there's going to be no stopping that super brain of yours.